The Adventures of Golden A.S.S.

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My second issue comes out on Monday!!!!!!  

So excited!!!!!!

Drowning in a Sea of Overwhelmingness…..

For the past 3 years I have been working towards one goal, to create a comic book. These last few months, that goal is slowly becoming a reality and as the moment comes for me to send off my creation to be published, I’m feeling very overwhelmed.

It feels as though, creating the book was the easy part. Now comes the daunting task of actually putting it out there. To self publish or try and get signed… To obtaining all copy rights and trademarks. To buying ISBNs and getting bar codes. To advertising and promoting

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. Doing press releases and just basically selling my story.

I thought I had help, someone who would be there for me, when I had questions, concerns and just guidance, since that someone is heavily in the world of comic books. BUT that someone has disappeared and seems as though they don’t want to help me at all… Which means, I’m all alone…

Deep breath….

This morning, I’m trying to figure out if, in fact, I have a comic book or a graphic novel. If it is a comic book, then I don’t need an ISBN BUT if it’s a graphic novel, I do…. There is a difference?

I feel lost… But I guess that’s what happens when you decided to enter a world you have no experience in whatsoever.

There are many online guidelines out there that give you a set of instructions on what to do. They are useful. They give you a glimpse of what needs to be done. I just wish someone else would take my project and do all that work!!!

But in the end, I just have to take lots of deep breaths, focus and slowly chip away at what needs to be accomplished because as I’ve been telling all my friends, this project, it’s my hobby and when I’m 80 years old, I’ll look back and say, I created something and that’s not too shabby….

Doubts….

The other night I was laying in MG’s arms and I had a dreadful thought, that perhaps we weren’t meant to be laying in each other’s arms, cuddling, falling asleep so comfortably….  That maybe even though we are in love it’s not going to last… 

Are you suppose to doubt???  Are things suppose to be sooo comfortable and easy that worry is not a feeling anymore???  Should you feel troubled while laying in their arms???  Is this all part of the process of being in the first stages of a relationship???

Deep down I know he could possibly be the one for me… I’m scared…

Is that why I’m feeling these doubts???  Am I trying to sabotage myself mentally??? 

Last night he dropped the bomb on the fact he can not/ will not/ would not support me in my endeavors with my comic book…  I was/am hurt by this revealing fact.  He states that he can’t support something that involves my past lovers.  He doesn’t want to know anything about the guys. I understand that to a point but his stupid past has poked her head into our relationship several times so far…  

But in a relationship, shouldn’t you always support the other even if you don’t always agree with what it may be? 

I have been working so hard on my comic book for years.  It’s on the last leg and the first issue will soon be published.  I want the man who says I’m the love of his life to be there, proud of my accomplishments and there to support me if it doesn’t succeed but when he tells me he will never support my comic book, it gives me a gigantic pause in the future of our relationship… 

If he can’t support me in this endeavor, what else won’t he support me in?  What if my comic book turns out to be a great success, will he sit at home, pouting and not go out to celebrate it because it just happens to involved loosely some of my past?  And what if, it fails miserably and I need someone to console my emotions, will he be there with open arms and try to convince me to keep going because it’s my passion, when he in fact could care less of my book?

Can a relationship survive if one of the significant other doesn’t support?

Tonight I have to myself….  I’m going to contemplate lots of things

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.  Working on things and figure out the best way to brooch the subject of support to MG when I see him tomorrow night… 

Comic Con 2013

My bout with Comic Con 2013 has ended…  I went to Comic Con with a few goals. 

1-      To learn more about the whole comic book world

2-      To meet new people that could possibly help me on my journey

3-      To gain recognition/new followers

4-       To have fun

I can say successfully that my goals were met! 

What I have learned in the comic world is that it’s cut throat.  There are lots of wheeling and dealing going on and unless you really know someone who knows someone, it is very difficult to accomplish anything.  But that’s pretty much in any business world.  I learned that a majority of people will help you only so far.  The majority don’t really want to see you succeed.  They only give you a small fraction of what you really need to know.  BUT if you are lucky, you meet certain people that are open and want to truly help you out and want to see you succeed.  I was fortunate enough to meet these people. And these people say I can do everything on my own

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.  When there is a will there is a way!  

I avoided the traditionally mingling route that many in the “industry” went to after the days events were over.  At first I was inclined to go to the usually spot because great networking could be done and does happen.  Plus I knew some of the people and I wouldn’t feel so alone as I had felt during the day when passing out my postcards and trying to drum up recognition.   But there was a part of me that didn’t want to go because since I am new to the whole world, I felt that many didn’t feel like I belonged, because I hadn’t paid my “dues” …  So I didn’t go, instead I ventured on my own to seek out places to hangout and struck up conversations with random strangers, just to talk to, and turned out to be the exact random strangers that I needed to meet… 

I gained new followers.  To some, the few that I gained may not seem much but to me it means the world because it’s one new follower that I didn’t have and may never have gained had I not been promoting myself.  I say that because during a lunch break, I struck up a conversation with these two college boys, in town from Texas.  They were cocky little things but I played along with their questionings and their bull shit.  I could tell they were trying to blow smoke up my ass by saying they would like me on facebook and even going so far as to pull out their phones to like, even though I never received notification that they actually “liked” my fan page…  One of the boys asked me how many new likes/followers had a gained, I gave them a number and I could tell they were secretly laughing, like I was wasting my time, energy and money to only gain a few.  At first I was disappointed that my promoting only yielded a small number but reflecting, one new follower is still better than zero! 

And I had FUN!  I may have been by myself this entire time.  Alone and feeling lonely at some points but I knew what I was doing was right, that everything happens for a reason.  If we are not comfortable or like being by ourselves then how can anyone, or why would anyone want to be with us, if we don’t first enjoy being with ourselves!  I partied, stayed out late, met new people and had 2 adorable guys as roommates!  And I got a celebrity to question my costume and say my name.  You best be sure he won’t be forgetting me! 

Over all this Comic Con session was a success.  I went in not expecting much but gaining more than I had anticipated!  I’m going back home with new inspirations, new friends, new motivation and a spring in my step…

I’m looking forward to getting together with my illustrator and putting together my first issue!

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Ms. C

I think this version of Ms

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Ms. C

Second draft of Ms. C…  I think she looks too whimsical…  Disney-ish…  Need her to look more sex bomb with authority

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