The other night I was laying in MG’s arms and I had a dreadful thought, that perhaps we weren’t meant to be laying in each other’s arms, cuddling, falling asleep so comfortably…. That maybe even though we are in love it’s not going to last…
Are you suppose to doubt??? Are things suppose to be sooo comfortable and easy that worry is not a feeling anymore??? Should you feel troubled while laying in their arms??? Is this all part of the process of being in the first stages of a relationship???
Deep down I know he could possibly be the one for me… I’m scared…
Is that why I’m feeling these doubts??? Am I trying to sabotage myself mentally???
Last night he dropped the bomb on the fact he can not/ will not/ would not support me in my endeavors with my comic book… I was/am hurt by this revealing fact. He states that he can’t support something that involves my past lovers. He doesn’t want to know anything about the guys. I understand that to a point but his stupid past has poked her head into our relationship several times so far…
But in a relationship, shouldn’t you always support the other even if you don’t always agree with what it may be?
I have been working so hard on my comic book for years. It’s on the last leg and the first issue will soon be published. I want the man who says I’m the love of his life to be there, proud of my accomplishments and there to support me if it doesn’t succeed but when he tells me he will never support my comic book, it gives me a gigantic pause in the future of our relationship…
If he can’t support me in this endeavor, what else won’t he support me in? What if my comic book turns out to be a great success, will he sit at home, pouting and not go out to celebrate it because it just happens to involved loosely some of my past? And what if, it fails miserably and I need someone to console my emotions, will he be there with open arms and try to convince me to keep going because it’s my passion, when he in fact could care less of my book?
Can a relationship survive if one of the significant other doesn’t support?
Tonight I have to myself…. I’m going to contemplate lots of things
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. Working on things and figure out the best way to brooch the subject of support to MG when I see him tomorrow night…