Since it’s my birthday month, I’m doing lots of reflecting. I’m doing a lot of playing back my year and revisiting my actions to see what needs to change for this coming year. Most people do this around the beginning of the New Year. I do it the new year of my birth.
Last year many adventures were had, I started a blog! I met lots of new people and been on plenty of dates.
I thought I met an amazing man that I wanted to spend my life with, unfortunately he isn’t quite on the same page as me. Yes that would be Irish Boy. He didn’t call/text me to wish me a happy birthday. He actually hasn’t spoken to me in over a month. Definitely not wanting me…
Before sitting down writing this entry, I was staring at my book shelf and a book jumped out at me.
“He’s just not that into you”
WOW! It’s been years since I first read this great revelation
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. I completely forgot how amazing this book is! As I began flipping through the pages, I’m replaying everything IB and I went through. All the dates, all the romps, all the excuses…
I think about all the conversations we have had, all the promises that were broken and the relationship that never came to be.
And after re-reading “He’s just not that into you”, I’m finally ready to let IB go. He isn’t all that great if he doesn’t realize the greatness before him, ME! I have to metaphorically say good bye to him because well, since he isn’t talking to me, can’t really say it to his face. I’m letting him go…
Speaking of letting go, I have also decided to let HB go as well. It’s not going anywhere. He doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me. He enjoys the every few months get together romps but I want MORE!
I want to be in a relationship! I want to be in LOVE! I want to meet a guy who worships the ground that I walk upon. I want someone to stay young with!
And I can’t do any of that if I keep holding onto these guys that are definitely not emotionally and physically unavailable to me. I know that these past months I have been lying to myself and keeping everything at bay but that has to stop. Especially in this new year!
Perhaps now that I’m making peace with these less then desirable guys, I’ll really concentrate on all guys from every aspect of my life that shows me interest…
BUT these guys actually still have to be worthy of me and bring to the table lots because even though I’ve been a bit pathetic, I still have my standards!!!!
Let’s see what this year brings!!! Turning 25 again never looked so ADVENTUROUS!