Previously I had written that my first love had written to me asking about what I truthfully thought of him. It took me nearly 2 weeks to compose a message
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. It was definitely tough but also easy since I didn’t know him anymore.
The message was short and to the point. I told him what I remembered of him and how he made me feel but also my apprehensions of what I felt during the time we were together. I said I would always carry a soft spot for him in my heart.
He sent a reply to my message, thanking me for my honesty. He wished that we could have spoken the last time I reached out to him but his ex wife was accusing him of always cheating and he didn’t want anymore trouble. He hoped that someday we could see each other again. He then wrote, he kept all our pictures from Maui and the memory of my face when he found my pearl ring in the ocean was forever in his mind.
My heart skipped a beat and I did get teary eyed from reading that last part. I had forgotten about how I accidentally dropped my pearl ring in the middle of the ocean while we were snorkeling and he went searching for it and actually found it! I still have the ring at my mom’s house, along with the ring he gave me to symbolize our love and future together.
How young and innocent we once were. The promise of ever lasting love and a happily ever after. I wonder if we never left that island, would we be together now. If we could stay in the magic that Maui has and forget the troubles and reality that tore us apart…
I still very much care for him and wish him the best but I doubt that anything could ever happen between us again. I’m not the innocent girl with a mischievous side he once knew. The mischievous side has over taken and innocence is a thing of the past.
Plus it feels as though my heart belongs to another even though Irish boy and I haven’t spoke in what seems like ages. I feel more strongly towards IB then I did my first.
It’s funny how the mind and heart play against each other. I’m starting to wonder my feelings for IB. But I know deep down that I could never start something up again with my first. Or could I???
I won’t think about that now. I’ll think about it tomorrow during Happy Hour when I will have had plenty to drink and lots of guys to flirt with!!!!