I woke up Thursday morning after my date with the Skipper, over thinking and over analyzing the night. My gut was telling me, I wouldn’t be seeing the Skipper again. I kept replaying our converation after our sexual bout. I knew that I shouldn’t have jokingly commented on the quickness of a certain position. Once my mouth opened I couldn’t stop the words from coming out. I tried to cover my words up by saying, it’s that position… it’s the point of no return…
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. it felt great but it’s a sure thing position… UGH!!!!! I couldn’t stop the diarrhea that kept coming out….
What should a guy do next? Either jump me and try it again or leave… He left…
All Thursday afternoon I couldn’t stop thinking of what I could have done, said differently but in the end the words were out and he could either see me again or tell me to fuck off. I, not wanting to wait for what he could or could not say, texted him:
I prefer the distraction of my Skipper vs the neighbors attempt to out do the sounds from last night. Do you think we can show them how it’s done again?
His response: I’m gonna have to say yesss!
Me: I can’t wait to come in the captain’s quarters
No response….
Friday I refrained from any text messages. Went out to dinner with a great girlfriend and we analyzed the date and came to the conclusion that I am over reacting and he will call and if he doesn’t then he’s an ass and I will find another… Plums said I should text him in the morning with:
Good Morning my Skipper! Are you at attention saluting the Golden Ass?
4 hours later I get this: Ha! Was playing golf all day. What’s up Golden?
We sent a few texts back and forth, then I said:
My friend is throwing an impromtu pre new york friendsgiving dinner tomorrow, would you like to come?
His response: I can’t. Sounds like fun though. Thanks for thinking of me
Me: Guess I will just wait for you to ask me out on our fourth date to see you again…. 😉
No response….
Saturday night, Plums and I decided to go out in our costumes and paint Santa Monica gold and silver! I over loaded on tequila danced the night away. I did get a marriage proposal from an Aussie… If I was the marrying type for citizenship, I would have married him in a heart beat!
Sunday I was running around working, meeting friends, stuffing my face and trying VERY hard not to think of the Skipper… I wonder if his ears were ringing with all the talking about him that went on during the Friendsgiving dinner!
Monday, Plums, a friend A and I stayed in our pj’s, drinking endless amounts of wine, watched girlie love stories and bemoaned stupid guys. I drunkenly texted:
Did your ship sink or are you lost at sea?
His response: I’m on a deserted island, shipwrecked!
Me: I have a rescue dingy, if I were to paddle over, would you jump in to my pirate booty?
His reply: Ahoy! I would plunder and pillage that booty
I did not send anything else. I have given him amble amount to ask me out again. Sent him clues that I wanted him too. I know I should have waited from the start but after his quick departure on our date, I knew that I had to figure out if he truly wanted to see me again. I hate sitting back waiting.
I’m the kind of person who if I like something I go after it. I don’t sit around waiting for validation from the person. I need to know where/what is going on to set my brain on the right path. I hate not knowing.
If sex is the only option on the table I’ll go for sex. But if there is a fake display of a possible relationship, I’m always going for the display even if I chip a tooth on the fakeness.
It would have been great if the Skipper said he was only interested in sex. Not the fake pretense of getting to know me just to get me into bed. I would have just jumped into bed with him if that was all he wanted. I need a new position filled on my roster. But with him leading me on, before the date with all the text messages and then during the date, the great conversation, I started to think maybe he would be dating material… Perhaps I’m jumping to conclusion and over thinking, over analyzing everything but I NEED to KNOW!!!! The lack of communication is driving me MAD!!!! But then again, perhaps the lack of communication is his way of telling me he’s not interested in me and only toys with a few messages for the chance of a booty call one desperate night….
With that I have deleted his number, all messages. I LOVE the delete button!!! If he really wants to see me again, he has to call me. I’m kicking myself with the weakness I displayed. Sometimes pretending to be strong always leaves you weak…